Cleveland Heights High School
Teammates die in crash

"We had a good time every time I was with them. I'll miss the expressions on their faces.", Andrew Weller


Milton Carter Jr., 18
Brendon Benner, 18
Kyle Barden, 16
Photos from Sun Press Newspapers


From The Cleveland Plain Dealer

February 12, 2001
Teammates die in crash

By SUSAN RUIZ PATTON
PLAIN DEALER REPORTER

SHAKER HEIGHTS - At first, Milton Carter did not want to talk about his 18-year-old son - his grief was so great.

But his pride was greater. Within minutes, he spoke about his son's college scholarships, what position he played on the Cleveland Heights High School hockey team and what a good kid he was.

The Carters are one of three families planning funerals today rather than looking forward to tonight's first round state qualifying tournament hockey game against Benedictine High School. The game has been postponed.

The three, all hockey players at Heights High, were killed in a one-car crash in Shaker Heights early yesterday.

They were among five Cleveland Heights teens in the car headed home at 12:40 a.m. after visiting friends in Bainbridge Township, Carter said. The car crashed into trees on westbound Shaker Blvd., west of Green Rd. One boy walked away from the crash; another remains hospitalized in critical condition.

Brendon Benner, 18, and Kyle Barden, 16, died at the scene.

Milton Carter Jr., 18, died at 9 a.m. yesterday after being taken off life support, his father said. His neck had been broken and doctors said he would have remained in a coma even if he had lived.

Greg Uguccini, 15, another Cleveland Heights hockey player in the car, was transferred to Rainbow Babies & Children's Hospital yesterday afternoon. He was listed in critical condition last night in a pediatric intensive care unit, a University Hospital spokeswoman said.

Scott Greggor, a soccer player and Heights student, told paramedics he was wearing his seat belt in the back seat. He was treated at Hillcrest Hospital and released. His father said he had the grim task of telling his son about his friends' deaths.

The car went through the intersection at Green Rd. before it hit trees in the woods on the south side of the westbound lanes. Firefighters found the car on its side, Shaker Heights Fire Lt. Patrick Sweeney said.

"It seems pretty apparent that speed had something to do with it," Sweeney said. "They went through the intersection pretty fast and there is a dip in the road and that’s where they probably lost control."

Shaker Heights police would not release details on the crash investigation, including information on whether speed contributed to the accident or whether the other youths were wearing seat belts.

It was the third time in the last six months that three or more teens were killed in car crashes in Northeast Ohio. In September, three Ravenna teens were killed when a van driven by Jennifer M. Hogue, then 17, collided with a truck in Portage County. Hogue survived.

In December, six teens were killed in Wayne County when a car driven by Jeffery P. Kaufmann, 18, went out of control on a curve and hit a tree. Kaufmann did not survive.

Cleveland Heights-University Heights School officials yesterday were assembling the school system’s crisis team to meet with students today.

"They’re just good kids - all of them," said Kirk Guenther, the high school’s hockey coach. "Hard-working, good kids, loyal to their friends and the team and the coaching staff. They’re three kids that will be missed from the bottom of the hearts of everyone."

Barden and Carter played forward for the Cleveland Heights Tigers, and Benner played defenseman, Guenther said.

Guenther joined more than a dozen boys at a teammate’s house yesterday afternoon. Wearing somber expressions, a few of the boys milled around outside the house as more gathered inside.

At the accident scene, where shattered bits of glass, mirror and headlights littered the ground, friends of the three boys killed gathered to leave mementos of hockey pucks, hockey jerseys, flowers and notes addressed to their friends. Youngsters visiting the makeshift memorial greeted one another with hugs and tears.

"Milton was one of the hardest-working people I know," said Justin Kalman, 17, of Cleveland Heights, who had played hockey with Carter since the two were in elementary school. "Kyle was funny, he was a free spirit."

"Brendon did what he wanted when the spirit moved him," said another classmate, Pleurat Dreshaj, 17.

"It’s going to be hard, not hearing Milton’s laugh," said Lisa Stephenson, 17, another Heights classmate.

The Carter family was awakened at 2 a.m. yesterday when police knocked on their door to deliver news of the accident.

Milton, a high school senior, had several hockey scholarships, but his mother wanted him to accept the scholarship offered by Niagara University, said his sister, Wendy Vaughn.

"He was a good kid," his father said as he studied a photograph of Milton. "No father could ask for a better son. We will all miss him very dearly."

Plain Dealer reporter Mark Naymik contributed to this article.
E-mail: spatton@plaind.com
Phone: 216-999-4937
©2001 THE PLAIN DEALER.



February 13, 2001
Heights High hockey stars’ friends mourn

Counselors called in for all students as teammates agree to play again Saturday

By PATRICK O’DONNELL and SUSAN RUIZ PATTON
PLAIN DEALER REPORTERS

CLEVELAND HEIGHTS - Cleveland Heights High School students will spend this week mourning and burying three of their hockey stars.

On Saturday, they will cheer as the rest of the playoff-bound team takes the ice in their honor.

The school was in upheaval yesterday after three hockey players were killed in a car crash early Sunday. A fourth player remains in critical condition, and the only student to walk away uninjured returned to school yesterday to be with his classmates.

Brendon Benner, 18, was driving nearly twice the speed limit and had just passed another car on Shaker Blvd. west of Green Rd. early Sunday when he lost control of his car and it smashed into trees, Shaker Heights police said. Benner and passenger Kyle Barden, 16, died at the scene. Milton Carter, 18, died later that morning from a broken neck suffered in the crash.

While players worried about injured teammate Greg Uguccini, 15, they met with coaches yesterday to decide whether to continue their season after postponing a game against Benedictine High School last night.

"The team and coaches ... agreed the best way to honor their friends was to play," said the school district’s athletic director, Mike Dellapina. "That is what the kids would have wanted."

The Benedictine game has been rescheduled for 10 a.m. Saturday at the Brooklyn Ice Rink, Dellapina said. That is likely to be the day after the last funerals.

Shaker Heights Police Chief Walter Ugrinic said excessive speed was the major cause of the crash. Benner lost control of his red 1991 Audi 100 and began to skid after passing another car about 250 feet west of a Regional Transit Authority driveway west of Green Rd., he said.

Shaker Blvd. has two lanes in each direction with a broad median between, Ugrinic said, and Benner passed a car that was in the left lane by driving at least 60 mph in a 35-mph zone in the right lane. Ugrinic said he was not sure why, but Benner then cut into the left lane in front of the passed car and lost control.

"It hit the curb and flipped over several times, hit a tree that was partially up, catapulted and came to rest," Ugrinic said.

When the car hit the tree, it actually bounced higher into other trees off the south side of the road, Ugrinic said. Paramedics found the car on its side, with three of the teens inside and two thrown free.

Both of the ejected passengers, Scott Greggor, 16, and Uguccini, survived. Uguccini was in critical but stable condition yesterday at Rainbow Babies & Children’s Hospital. Greggor, unhurt, talked to paramedics at the scene, police said, and was back at school yesterday.

Ugrinic said none of the teens wore seat belts. Greggor, however, told rescuers that he had been. Ugrinic said officers planned to interview Greggor late yesterday.

Ugrinic said he had no idea how Greggor was thrown without injury.

The car, stored yesterday at Shaker Auto Hospital, was crumpled, with the rear end crushed far more than the front. The driver-side rear passenger door was caved in with a huge cylindrical dent.

Ugrinic said there was no evidence at the scene of alcohol or drug use. Blood test results will not be known for two to three weeks. Ugrinic said police were investigating whether the teens were visiting friends or were at a party in Bainbridge Township.

Students at the high school yesterday said students were handing out fliers at the school last week advertising a party in Bainbridge Township. None of them recalled specifics of the party.

Precious Givens, 16, was invited to the party and was furious with her parents for not letting her go, she said. She’s not mad about it anymore.

"You’re not supposed to die that young," she said.

Bainbridge Township police said there were no complaints about large parties over the weekend.

Superintendent Paul Masem said Heights High’s 2,200 students were told of the crash in a public address announcement yesterday, and teachers shared more details in class.

Counselors followed the class schedules of the dead students to talk to classmates. Students yesterday praised other counselors who offered them Gatorade, bottled water, cookies and tissues and who set up tables in the library for students to write letters to the dead boys’ parents.

Drew Slack, 14, addressed one letter to Kyle Barden’s parents. She had known him since elementary school.

"I wrote a letter saying how bad I felt and that I’m there if they need anything," Slack said.

Other students said the accident made them reflect on their own - and their loved ones’ - mortality. Jasmine Marrow, 16, left class at midday to call her father just to talk.

The district has brought in extra substitutes to allow teachers time off, which some took yesterday. The school also is considering a memorial service. And though Masem rejected a plan to create small memorials at the students’ lockers, students posted notes on them anyway. Students said the father of one of the teens stared at the locker and the notes.

Barden’s services are at 4 p.m. today at the Berkowitz-Kumin-Bookatz funeral home, 1985 S. Taylor Rd., Cleveland Heights.

Benner’s services are at 7 p.m. tomorrow at Maher-Melbourne funeral home, 4274 Mayfield Rd., South Euclid.

Services for Carter are pending at DeJohn-Flynn-Mylott funeral home, 4600 Mayfield Rd., South Euclid.

E-mail: paodonnell@plaind.com
Phone: 216-999-4818
E-mail: spatton@plaind.com
Phone: 800-628-6689
©2001 THE PLAIN DEALER



February 14, 2001
A place where, life, death met
REGINA BRETT
PLAIN DEALER REPORTER

It's hard not to cry when you see where they died.

Follow the black tire marks left in the street and you end up facing the newly splintered tree trunks where, high above your head, metal slammed into wood.

Read the pink words investigators spray-painted along the curb and you learn the grim story: Plane. Launch. Tree.

The car full of five teens hit the curb at 60 mph, catapulted into the air, flipped, then hit tree after tree after tree while airborne.

Follow the mud imprints of a thousand sneakers and you end up where mourners have left a shrine to their lost youth.

The accident scene on Shaker Blvd. just west of Green Rd. resembles a teenager's bedroom, with T-shirts, sweatshirts and jerseys hanging from tree limbs. Friends have left hockey sticks, CDs, cheerleading pompons, photographs and private notes addressed to Milt, Benner and Kyle.

Look closely through the gifts and you find glittering shards of glass on the ground. Look closer still and you discover the black hockey pucks teammates left behind. Brendon Benner, Kyle Barden and Milton Carter Jr., who died in the Sunday morning accident, played hockey for Cleveland Heights High School.

All day long, strangers stop to pay their respects.

"Did you know the guys?" one woman asks another.

"No," the woman answers. "Did you?"

"No," the stranger replies.

Still, they cry.

The adults who stop know it could have been their sons.

The teens who stop know it could have been them.

A mother with two little girls leaves a basket of daisies. A gray-haired man leaves a yellow rose. A teenager pauses for a long time before leaving his lacrosse stick.

Every few minutes, another person arrives and leaves something, if only a prayer.

People stand in silence and read the notes: "It could have happened to any of us. I'm sorry it had to happen to you .... We'll never forget .... We'll miss you .... My heart will forever cry .... I'll never forget your jokes, smile and beautiful eyes."

Cars slow down as drivers stare. Teens hold carnations and sniff. No one speaks. No one needs to.

Two girls stand for a long time scanning the place where life met death. The girl with the ponytail begins to weep as her friend with the pierced nose wraps her arms around her as tightly as a parent would. The girl sobs into her arms. The friend holds her up, then whispers to a stranger that the girl's brother died here.

They cling to each other, rocking like a mother and child, and you wonder if you've ever before seen such pure love and raw grief. Then they are gone, stumbling through the mud, wiping tears and holding hands.

Yet here in the dark dreary brown of February, there is hope. A candle burns despite the wind's efforts to blow it out. Pink and yellow tulips grace the carpet of dead brown leaves as if to prove that life will triumph over death. There are so many flowers that when you breathe in, you smell spring.

As you watch the students come and go, you see how death transformed these three hockey players into teachers overnight, teachers whose lessons will last a lifetime.

They are teaching us that life is short. That we are not invincible, immortal or unbreakable.

Because of those hockey players, teens and parents everywhere are talking about life and death and what really matters in between.

Because of those boys, kids who have never prayed are talking to God.

If you measure the worth of a life by the impact it had on others, these boys will live to see old age through the lives of others, even if the only message the living take from them is this:

Slow down, slow down, slow down.

E-mail: rbrett@plaind.com
Phone: 216-999-6328
©2001 THE PLAIN DEALER.



Saturday, February 17, 2001
Teens in fatal crash were drinking

By PATRICK O’DONNELL
PLAIN DEALER REPORTER

SHAKER HEIGHTS - The driver in the accident that killed three Cleveland Heights High School hockey players last week had minimal amounts of alcohol in his blood but was not legally drunk, according to blood tests released by the Cuyahoga County coroner yesterday.

Brendon Benner, 18, of Cleveland Heights, had a blood alcohol level of .01 percent when he lost control of his car early Sunday morning and went off Shaker Blvd. into trees. That level is one-tenth the blood alcohol content that would make him legally drunk if he were an adult.

For drivers under the age of 21, the standard under state law is .02 percent. The tests place Benner’s blood alcohol level at half that amount.

Kyle Barden, 16, who was killed in the crash, had a blood alcohol level of .06 percent, according to Deputy Coroner Robert Challener. No alcohol was detected in the blood of Milton Carter Jr., 18, who died several hours after the crash. Challener said it is unclear what Carter’s blood alcohol level was at the time of the crash because he survived for several hours and alcohol may have been processed from his system in that time.

Shaker Heights Deputy Police Chief Scott Lee said investigators would not comment on the case until full blood test results are available in a week or two. He said police were still investigating.

Police have attributed the accident to excessive speed, saying Benner drove his 1991 Audi at least 60 mph as he passed another car west of Green Rd. in a 35-mph zone. Police said he lost control as he changed lanes and the car flipped as it left the road.

One other passenger, Scott Greggor, 16, was not injured and returned to school this week. Another hockey teammate, Greg Uguccini, remained in critical but stable condition yesterday at Rainbow Babies & Children’s Hospital. He has been unconscious since the accident with head injuries.

With all three funerals completed yesterday, students and the school are turning their attention to the hockey team’s playoff game against Benedictine today at 10 a.m. at the Brooklyn Recreation Center, 7600 Memphis Ave. All 2,000 tickets will go on sale at the rink for $4 each about an hour before the game. There are no advance sales.

Heights High Principal James Cipolletti said that despite the accident, attendance was strong at school this week. He said students seemed to skip some classes during the day but most came to be with their classmates. He said he hoped normal operations would resume next week.

Benner was scheduled to appear in Cleveland Heights Municipal Court next month on a second-degree misdemeanor charge of brandishing a replica firearm in public. According to Cleveland Heights Police Chief Martin Lentz, Benner was spotted by a delivery man at about noon Jan. 18 carrying a handgun in the parking lot across the street from the high school and behind the Cedar-Lee movie theater. The gun, Lentz said, turned out to be a Crossman BB pistol.

Heights High Athletic Director Mike Dellapina said yesterday that Benner was suspended from the team for two games earlier this year for a violation of team rules but would not say if the suspension was related to that incident.

Meanwhile, the Heights High School Hockey Memorial Fund has been opened at Ohio Savings Bank. Contributions can be deposited at any branch. The fund will be used to help the families with funeral expenses, to support future scholarships and to rebuild the hockey program.

E-mail: paodonnell@plaind.com
Phone: 216-999-4818
©2001 THE PLAIN DEALER.
 



From the Sun Press Newspapers

Friends weep; police probe speed, Saturday party in traffic deaths

 By JEFF SIKOROVSKY
 Staff Writer

 Feb. 15, 2001

 SHAKER HEIGHTS — Andrew Weller, 17, who dropped out of Cleveland Heights High School in December, sat
 shivering and alone in the cold night air Monday. He was dressed in black, and he wore a thick knit hat to keep warm.

 He was sitting on an old log at the site of the high-speed car crash that killed three of his best friends the day before
 and left one clinging for life. Another victim miraculously walked away with only minor injuries.

 "I wish I could have said good-bye. I'm going to remember them forever. This is such a bad way to go," Weller said.
 "We had a good time every time I was with them. I'll miss the expressions on their faces."
 

Milton Carter Jr., 18
Brendon Benner, 18
Kyle Barden, 16

So will the Cleveland Heights-University Heights school community, relatives and friends.The candy apple red 1991 Audi 100, driven by Heights High senior Brendon Benner, 18, catapulted off that log and into the woods along Shaker Boulevard around 12:40 a.m. Sunday. Benner's father Bill had recently given Brendon the car.

 Shaker Heights police said Benner was going faster than 60 m.p.h., well over the posted 35 m.p.h. limit.

 He had swerved to miss a slower car before skidding off the road. Skid marks stretched for 100 feet and pointed to
 where the car hit the curb, bounced off the log and flipped several times before landing on its side.

 Benner and Heights sophomore Kyle Barden, 16, died on the scene and had to be cut from the wreck. Senior Milton
 Carter Jr., 18, died from a broken neck eight hours later after being taken off life support at the hospital.

 Families of the deceased could not be reached for comment.

 Two other passengers who were thrown from the car survived. Sophomore Greg Uguccini, 15, was in critical condition
 this week at Rainbow Babies & Childrens' Hospital.

 Scott Greggor, 16, who walked away, returned to school Monday with his parents to receive counseling.

 Scott said he had been wearing his seat belt. That contradicted police, who said none of the car's occupants wore
 seatbelts.

 The last time Andrew saw his friends was at a party Saturday night at the house of a Hathaway Brown student on
 Bridgeway Drive in Bainbridge Township.

 He said teen-agers were drinking at the party, including his friends who were in the car.

 "There was not a lot (of drinking), but some people were," he added. He wasn't sure if Benner had been drinking, but
 said, "The other ones were."

 He added, "I don't think you'll ever get rid of drinking at high school parties, but being a little smarter about it could
 have prevented something like this. I think we're all learning something, like not to mess around in a car and wear seat
 belts."

 Weller planned on hanging out at the crash site for a while and sticking close to his other friends.

 "That's all we really have right now," he said. "You see it every day in the news, but it's never anyone you know. They
 were three who everybody liked so much."

 Shaker Police Chief Walter Ugrinic blamed "excessive speed" for the crash and said there was no evidence in the car
 pointing to alcohol or drugs as a cause of the accident.

 He said results from toxicology tests on the victims won't be in for two to three weeks.

 The Cuyahoga County Coroner's Official said it won't have toxicology results for six to eight weeks and had no
 preliminary findings as of Monday.

 "As far as I was concerned, these were good kids who made a bad decision this time," Ugrinic said.

 He also said there is a "remote possibility" that there was something wrong with the car that may have caused it to
 swerve out of control. He added that Shaker Boulevard is as well patrolled as it can be "with the resources we have."

 Ugrinic said the department is "still following up" about the party in Bainbridge.

 Bainbridge Police Chief James Jimison said Tuesday he was unaware of the party or of the Shaker police
 department's investigation.

 "They haven't contacted me. I haven't heard anything," Jimison said Tuesday. "We really know nothing about it."

 Bill Christ, head of school at Hathaway Brown School, confirmed the boys were coming from a party at the home of an
 HB student.

 "This was a party that was had by a family. This was not a school sanctioned event. It was not related to any
 Hathaway Brown function. It was a private event. There was no other school activity," he said.

 He did not give the family's name.

 "This is just a terribly tragic situation. We, like everybody else in the community, send our hearts out to the families of
 the victims," he said.

 The parent of a teen-ager himself, Christ added, "I just can't imagine the grief the parents are going through. Our
 school feels that as well."

 He said that in the aftermath, "Students were very concerned. We had counselors available for students to talk to who
 are helping students process this. We're all very much affected by this matter. We're making every effort to support our
 students. The whole community is in mourning."

Christine Sumner, vice president of the Cleveland Heights-University Heights Board of Education, asked for a
 moment of silence at the start of Monday's school board meeting.

 Afterward, she instructed the audience at Monday's board meeting to "go home tonight and hug your kid and talk
 to your teen-ager." Outside, the American flag was at half mast.

 Sumner said she hopes this incident will spark some conversation among parents and their children about
 making the right decisions in life.

 Superintendent Paul Masem detailed the overwhelming outpouring of support by the community and crisis
 counselors Monday at the high school.

 About 90 psychologists, social workers, parents and clergy volunteered in three areas of the school set up to
 provide individual and group counseling for friends, classmates, and even teachers of the three teens.
 Substitute teachers were brought in to take over classes if needed.

 Masem kept media off campus Monday, saying, "Things are pretty rough over here. We're going to try to get
 things back to normal as soon as possible."

 He said students were reasonably calm but still in a state of shock.

 "Staff said it was the quietest Monday morning they have ever heard," he said.

 He said it was the most difficult thing he has faced in his 30-year education career. He was not looking forward
 to a "week of funerals."

 Heights High Principal James A. Cipolletti said, "The lives of three individuals were cut short. There's not much
 you can say about it. It's tragic. Our main focus is helping kids and staff get past this."

 He added, "Kids just think they're invincible, that nothing can happen to them until something like this
 happens."

 Cipolletti said crisis intervention continued Tuesday at the high school, but to a lesser extent.

 "It's a little bit more calm today, at least outwardly," he said. "There are still about 40 students in the library for
 group counseling."

 © 2001 Sun Newspapers



Flowers, hockey sticks, and a sign: 'You are loved'
By JEFF SIKOROVSKY
Staff Writer

Feb. 15, 2001

SHAKER HEIGHTS — Hundreds of people from Heights High and other area schools
visited the crash site this week to express their grief over the loss of three lives taken too soon.

Sobs of pain and anger broke the silence of the normally quiet wooded stretch of westbound Shaker just east of Green Road.

The grassy strip leading from the RTA parking lot to the crash site turned muddy by Tuesday from all the foot traffic. Passing cars slowed as they drove by.

Teammates and friends of the three deceased Heights hockey players hugged each other for support or wandered alone, sifting through the underbrush looking for anything that could link them to the victims. Broken glass and plastic trim littered the ground.

Senior Pat Collins, a hockey teammate, scowled and fought back tears as he patrolled the area looking for answers, his hands thrust deep in his pockets. Senior defenseman Juho Peltola sat on the old log with his face in his hands. Neither was interested in talking, only in trying to pick up the pieces of what had happened.

Everyone who visited the site stopped to sign a large poster which read,
"You were loved." It was attached to one of the trees knocked down in the accident.

Other trees showed scars 10 feet up where the car grazed them as it flipped through the air. One tree top was snapped off.

A make-shift memorial of flowers, hockey sticks, pucks, jerseys, and other mementos mark the crash site.

There is a director's chair one of the boys used to sit in, and two take-out trays of Cokes from Chuck's Diner on Lee Road where the team hangs out. Others dropped off Slim Jims, the beef jerky treat a few of them enjoyed.

One flier had pictures of the three victims on it. It read,
"Never forget. Buckle up and drive safely. Always remember."

Robin and John Barrett, of Cleveland Heights, helped console the players and other students who showed up at the site Monday. Their son Josh used to play with Kyle, and John coached them all in the Heights youth hockey league.

"They should have been able to grow up," Robin said.

She'll remember Kyle's smile and how he would "whine" and blame Josh when they were caught rough-housing inside.

"They were good boys. All of them," John added. "We're going to miss them. Kids are supposed to grow up and have their dreams."

He said Benner started skating when he was 12, and although he struggled at first, he told his coach, "I'm going to get better." John noted Benner's "dedication," and added, "He was so focused on improving his skating skills."

"Milton put his heart and soul into the game," he said.

He added, however, "Kids have to let their parents parent them. We have to figure out a way to establish a dialogue between parents and their kids."

© 2001 Sun Newspapers



Mourners jam 'celebration of life'
By JEFF SIKOROVSKY Staff Writer
Feb. 15, 2001

CLEVELAND HEIGHTS — A pair of hockey gloves sat on three jerseys draped over the casket that held Kyle Barden, 16, Tuesday afternoon.

He was one of three Cleveland Heights High School students who died Sunday in a car accident on Shaker Boulevard in Shaker Heights.

It was standing room only as almost 1,000 people overflowed the Berkowitz-Kumin-Bookatz Memorial Chapel and lobby. They were there to pay their respects to the boy's family and console each other over one of the biggest losses this community has experienced in decades.

It was the first of three funerals this week attended by family, friends, teachers and others whose lives were touched by the three boys killed in the crash.

Funerals for the two other victims were set for Wednesday and today.

Photographs of Kyle at various stages of his childhood accompanied floral arrangements at the front of the packed chapel. A poster that read "You Were Loved" was surrounded by hand-written messages to the three teens, collected from the crash site.

The Heights Tigers hockey team filed in after everyone was seated, prompting tears from classmates and friends. The three dead boys played on the team.

Dennis Zimmerman, a friend of the Bardens, led the ceremony, which he said was a "celebration of life."

Zimmerman talked about how difficult it was for Kyle's mother to fill out an obituary form for the newspapers because he was so young and hadn't the time to accomplish his life's goals.

"Your presence is his obituary," he told the crowd, explaining that its love for him was the measure of his value.

"Kyle made a difference in his 16 years. Your presence is a testimony to his life," Zimmerman said.

Tigers' coach Kirk Guenther, a 1990 graduate of Heights High who also played hockey there, used Kyle's life to dispel Henry David Thoreau's claim that human beings are just nameless, faceless cogs in some bigger machine.

"I know without question Thoreau was wrong," he said, describing Kyle's passion for life and his loyalty to and love for his friends and family.

"Kyle tried to live life to the fullest. He was not a cog in a machine," he added.

Guenther told the crowd to say Kyle's name and "tell him you miss him," because "he hears us."

"If Thoreau had a chance to meet Kyle, he would have changed his writing to something more truthful," Guenther said. "Like love transcends all."

John Barrett, a former coach of the three boys and the father of one of Kyle's best friends, tugged heart-felt laughter from the crowd by reminding them that "Kyle could be difficult" in a playfully mischievous way.

He called him "strong, but rebellious," and "loyal, but irresponsible," to prove the point that "With Kyle, you got the whole enchilada whether you wanted it or not."

Barrett asked people to take the qualities they admired and respected about Kyle and "incorporate those into your lives," so in those difficult times they could pause and reflect on a "good friend."

He also stressed, "Wear your seat belts."

The last speaker was Kyle's older cousin Malcolm Watson, whom the boy had fondly nicknamed "Uncle Malcy."

"I watched Kyle grow up," he said, remembering with a laugh that Kyle didn't have eyebrows when he was little so Watson would draw them on with black magic marker. "Kyle didn't seem to mind."

He said Kyle had a "50-cent brain, but a million-dollar heart," and the determination to keep putting his hand up to answer a question in class even though he didn't know the answer.

"It was always so sweet. That's how I'll remember him," Watson said. "As just one sweet kid."

He said Kyle would throw himself at him as a kid and say, "Don't drop me."

Watson concluded, "I got you right here and I'm not letting you go."

When the service was over, the crowd filed slowly out to the parking lot and stood in silent support of the family inside. They wanted the Bardens to know they were not alone in their grief.

© 2001 Sun Newspapers



Just getting back on the ice is biggest victory for Heights

Sunday, February 18, 2001
By BILL LIVINGSTON
PLAIN DEALER COLUMNIST

When the Cleveland Heights Tigers huddled in front of their net before the opening faceoff against Benedictine yesterday in the state high school hockey tournament, it was nothing new. It is how they always start a game. Kids need to get back to a routine, everyone said, particularly after so much sorrow.

So the three excited hops they took on the ice of the Brooklyn Recreation Center after a team cheer was part of the ritual too. And so was the way they held their hockey sticks together, in the center of their circle, then raised them on high, like a salute to God above.

But this was not a normal game. The blessed uneventfulness of normalcy has not been a part of Cleveland Heights hockey in a week.

Seven days ago, at 12:40 a.m., three Heights Tigers died in a one-car accident, in which their car, going 60 mph in a 35-mph zone, swerved out of control, hit a curb, then went flying and smashing into a stand of trees. Killed were Brendon Benner, 18, the driver, along with teammates Kyle Barden, 16, and Milton Carter Jr., 18. A fourth player, Greg Uguccini, is still hospitalized, in critical condition.

The accident hit every parent everywhere. When you give them the keys, all you can do is trust them. It also tore a hole in the close-knit hockey community in Cleveland.

"Five of the six Benedictine starters live in Cleveland Heights," said Heights Athletic Director Mike Dellapina. "They all grew up playing together in the Cleveland Heights Junior Hockey program."

Benedictine coach Bob Kehres, whose inexperienced, unseeded Bengals were heavy underdogs against the eighth-seeded Tigers, told friends: "We’re in a no-win situation. Everybody thinks we’ll lose. Even if we win, how can we savor it?"

Heights overwhelmed the Bengals, 7-0. The Tigers scored less than three minutes into the game, and they scored in the last minute, and they scored in between.

But the score was not as important as the chance to skate, check and shoot again, to have memories other than death, pain and funerals. Once again, a red light meant only a goal, not the approach of emergency vehicles.

"I don’t know of any sport where there’s more of a family feeling than hockey," said Dellapina. "The joy and freedom of sports comes from actually getting out there and playing. That’s what we wanted them to get back to."

Hanging at the back of the Tigers bench was an empty hockey jersey with Uguccini’s number, 19, on it. Before the game began, Uguccini’s father had told Heights coach Kirk Guenther that Greg had opened his eyes for the first time since the accident. "That helped out tremendously," said Guenther. "We all needed some good news."

Many fans and tournament officials wore gold patches with "19" on it, flanked by skates and a hockey stick.

Almost all fans in Cleveland Heights black and gold pinned black ribbons to their chests, with small photographs of the three dead players on them. Cleveland Heights players and parents were unavailable for interviews at the game, in accordance with their wishes and that of the school district.

Heights coaches wore yellow roses in their lapels. The players’ numbers - 2 for Benner, 8 for Barden, 16 for Carter - were written on yellow paper on the stems. Benedictine players wrote the numbers on the back of their helmets.

Guenther arranged for the sporting goods company where he works to sew patches on the players’ jerseys. All three numbers were stitched on each circular patch. From a distance, it looked like the wheel-like logo of the black-and-gold Boston Bruins, only the hub of this wheel was grief.

"I got the first call at 7 a.m. last Sunday," said Dellapina. "Since then, I don’t think I’ve slept at all."

Guenther was at the hospital when the last of his three players, Milton Carter, died of his injuries. He has been the Heights hockey coach for five years, and before that, he played for the Tigers.

He had coached Benner and Carter in the youth hockey program when they were only 11 years old. "The year before I became the coach, the team didn’t win a game. With the help of kids like that, we won the city championship," he said.

In midweek, he took the yellow coat he wears once a year to the crash site and left it, along with the assorted jerseys, pucks, photographs and other heartbreaking mementos.

"It’s an ugly coat. It’s been handed down in the program from the coaches since the ’70s. The players always got a laugh out of guessing when I would wear it," said Guenther. "I left it there as a symbol of the love behind this hockey team."

The son of Plain Dealer reporter Wally Guenther, Kirk delivered the eulogies for all three players at their funerals.

For Benner, he disputed Henry David Thoreau’s assertion, "The mass of men lead lives of quite desperation." He said the philosopher never saw Benner’s joyful bond with others.

For Barden, he told a Japanese story, in which a tree was struck by lightning and blasted down before its time, yet the scattered seeds took root and came up, green and strong again. "That is how Barden is held in everyone’s heart," he said.

For Carter, he told of a mariner, lost at sea, with blackness creeping around, and of the star he found to steer his way home. "Milton Carter is a star to us, guiding us still," he said.

Kirk Guenther has not yet wept over the tragedy, because, he said, he needed all his strength and composure for his team. "I’ve told him the [grief] counselors we’ve had for the kids are for the others, too," Dellapina said.

When the game was over, the players and coaches formed two lines and shook hands, another ritual, and then they knelt together on the ice, in a moment of silence. It was the bookend to another silent moment that preceded the national anthem at the start of the game.

They cannot pray at such state athletic occasions, because the American Civil Liberties Union would throw a fit and a lawsuit, simultaneously. But in their private thoughts, some players surely gave thanks for getting through the awful week.

Then, they filed off the ice. As anybody who follows high school sports knows, they looked achingly young. But they had gotten so much older in a week.

E-mail: blivingston@plaind.com
Phone: 216-999-5754
©2001 THE PLAIN DEALER.



From The Sun Press
February 22, 2001

Teen party being probed

        Shaker crash victims partied here; tests indicate two had had alcohol

        By JEFF SIKOROVSKY
        Staff Writer

Feb. 22, 2001 BAINBRIDGE -After the Feb. 11 accident in Shaker Heights that killed three Cleveland Heights High School students, police here are investigating whether there was underage drinking at a teen-age party the boys attended Feb. 10 on Bridgeway Road.

Friends said they last saw the three boys — Kyle Barden, 16, Brendon Benner, 18, and Milton Carter Jr., 18, all of Cleveland Heights — at the party. One said some of the teens at the party, including the crash victims, were drinking, but not a lot.

The boys' car was going at least 65 m.p.h. around 12:40 a.m. when it skidded off Shaker Boulevard westbound just west of Green Road and flipped several times into the woods.

The Cuyahoga County Coroner's Office confirmed last week that at least two of the five boys who were in the car had been drinking, based on preliminary blood-alcohol tests.

One was Benner, the driver, who died at the scene. Dr. Richard Challener, from the coroner's office, said Benner had a blood-alcohol level of .01 grams per deciliter. That is half the legal limit of .02 for people under age 21 to drive a car, meaning Benner was not driving under the influence, according to the law. The legal limit for adults 21 and older is .1.

Barden, who also died at the scene, had a higher level of .06. The coroner could not determine if Carter had been drinking because he died eight hours later at the hospital when his father took him off life support.

"It may have well burned off," Challener said, although he did not claim Carter had been drinking.

Bainbridge Police Chief James Jimison said Tuesday, "We're investigating a report of a teen-age party where drinking may have been going on. It's a separate investigation from the Shaker Heights Police Department's (investigation of the crash)."

Jimison said he has not yet deter mined whether adults were aware of the underage drinking going on, whether alcohol was provided to minors or brought in, and whether drinking was going on inside or out side the house.

He also said there were a lot of uninvited guests at the party, which was intended to be a smaller get-together of close friends. A "flier," not an invitation, was posted on the Internet alerting outsiders to the party, he added.

Shaker police Chief Walter Ugrinic said the role drinking played in the accident  "still has yet to be determined." He has not received the coroner's full toxicology report. It will be done in a few weeks.

"Excessive speed is the main in indicator of the accident," he added.

Ugrinic said no criminal charges have been filed against the family that hosted the party. The daughter attends Hathaway Brown School in Shaker.

 "Just because a person had a party at their house, doesn't mean anyone did anything wrong," he said.

He did not comment on the possibility of future civil lawsuits against the family.

 "We don't handle civil charges," he added.

Heights sophomore Greg Uguccini, 15, one of the two students who survived the crash after being thrown from the car, was upgraded from critical to serious condition this week at Rainbow Babies and Children's Hospital.

"He sustained a serious brain injury, but his multiple internal injuries are showing continued improvement," a hospital spokeswoman added Tuesday.

On Saturday, Ugucinni opened his eyes for the first time since the accident — ironically, just before his Heights Tigers teammates took the ice against Benedictine in first round state tournament play. The team hung his jersey behind the bench to have him there in spirit.

Heights junior Scott Greggor, the other survivor, walked away from the crash with minor injuries. He was in school the day after the crash to get counseling. 



From The Sun Press
February 22, 2001

Lasting lessons in loving, losing

        Friends of three young crash victims seek strength in shared grief

        By JEFF SIKOROVSKY
        Staff Writer

        Feb. 22, 2001

CLEVELAND HEIGHTS — Their words can't begin to explain the "circle of sorrow" that has bound together family, friends, teachers, classmates and hockey teammates of the three Cleveland Heights High School students who died in the Feb. 11 car accident in Shaker Heights.

The community is in mourning after more than 1,000 people attended each of the funerals for Kyle Barden, 16, Brendon Benner, 18, and Milton Carter Jr., 18.

Leah DeGolia, 15, and Andreas Tekus, 18, two of many close friends of the boys, tried Tuesday to describe what the past week has been like in an interview with The Sun Press.

Talking about it, let alone living through it, was difficult.

"Nothing I would say about this would affect anyone outside of this community," Tekus said. "No one had the relationship I had with them."

His mother had known all the boys since they were babies. The older two went to preschool together.

"My mom looked at them as her children, too," he added.

Leah lives two doors down from the Carters on Compton Road. She found out about the accident just as Milton Carter Sr. was returning from the hospital that Sunday morning. He had just taken his son, who suffered a broken neck, off of life-support systems.

"I was in complete denial. I couldn't believe it. It still hadn't hit me until I saw their faces on TV and I just lost it because it was so unreal," she said. She sat in a chair in the principal's office Tuesday without even removing her backpack.

 "You couldn't really relate it to people. They would have to feel it," she added. "It was exhausting."

They all attended Boulevard Elementary School, Monticello Middle School, and Heights High together.

 "I remember hanging out at Milton's sleepovers and just being kids," Tekus said. "We ran around Park Synagogue all the time."

They played hockey together growing up, but Tekus didn't make the cut for the high school team because of low grades, so he played for the city instead.

He faced the initial shock of the crash when his mom woke him for church that morning. His friend Will called and broke the news to him.

"I was upset most of the day, but it didn't really kick in until I came to school Monday," Tekus said.

At school that Monday, a security guard stopped him outside his first-period class and directed him to a group counseling session. Benner and Carter had been in the same class.

There was a schoolwide moment of silence at 8:30 a.m. that day, and the flag was at half mast. The library, media center and auditorium had been set up for walk-in group and one-on-one counseling sessions staffed by as many as 90 volunteers.

"I don't talk in class as much now. I don't talk at all," he added.

He also didn't talk too much to the counselors at school because, as he said, "I just needed to be with my friends."

One thing that disturbed and upset him was how police left the crash site, which turned into a make-shift memorial to the boys.

He said there were "pools of blood" and "stuff hanging from trees." Sifting through the debris, his friends found personal items of the boys that should have been picked up.

"It was just a mess," he added.

Leah said, "School is definitely different. Seeing everyone cry was making things worse and worse. I spent Monday and Tuesday with friends at school but I stayed home Wednesday. I was so tired."

She had grown up with Kyle and knew the older boys from the neighborhood.

She said she felt "a little bit better" after Kyle's funeral.

 "It was like saying good-bye in a way."

Leah also took time to visit her classmate Greg Uguccini, one of two boys who survived the crash after being thrown from the car. Greg was listed in serious condition at Rainbow Babies and Children's Hospital with a serious brain injury and other internal injuries.

"He's responding to people and they helped him sit up the other day," she said.

Scott Greggor, the other survivor from the crash, walked away with minor injuries and returned to school the day after the crash for counseling.

Tekus was a pallbearer at Benner's funeral on Valentine's Day. The next day he showed up for first period but then left. He found some relief only after he accepted the fact that his friends were gone.

"Spending time with their families has helped a lot," he said. "This week we're looking through some of Brendon's things at Mrs. Benner's house."

He will remember his friends' smiles and other "personal stories" that brought a smile to his face at their mention.

He didn't know what lesson people should learn but said, "In my church we believe everything happens for a reason. People who didn't get along came together. It made friends a lot closer. It made people realize how important friendship is and how hard it is to lose one, or three."

He couldn't explain it, but said, "It changed me. I just think about things differently."

Leah agreed, adding, "All of my friends were in petty fights, and after this we all hugged and apologized, promising we won't bring them up again. Some things like that shouldn't break friendships up."

She said her friends started talking about all of the fun and good times they had with Kyle in elementary and middle school.

 "It really helped a lot," she said.

Having just gotten her temporary driver's license, she has learned to wear her seat belt and not speed. She hopes others will learn this lesson, too.

At Benner's memorial service, John Barrett, a family friend who coached the boys when they were younger, described the core group of grieving families and friends as a "circle of sorrow."

He said it was the circle's "obligation" to teach people outside the circle about the kind of pain they have faced.

"It's your turn to protect us from this sorrow ever happening again," he added.

At the crash site last week, he also said, "Kids have to let their parents parent them. We have to figure out a way to establish a dialogue between parents and their kids."

He repeated this in his remarks at the service.

Principal James Cipolletti said the initial shock of the accident reminded students that they're not invincible.

He wonders, though, "Will it last?"

Becky Bode, the district's head psychologist, has been part of the pupil services department for over 20 years. She was notified of the accident within hours and started to carry out the crisis-intervention plan.

"Unfortunately, I've had this experience before. I just went into response mode,and started doing all the planning," she said Friday. "I don't see this as a job. I'm here for service. That's what my belief is."

She didn't want to take credit for the support effort, praising instead the work of the administration, principals and volunteers.

The district brought in counselors from a dozen health-care and social service agencies and institutions around Greater Cleveland. And ministers and rabbis lent a listening ear, support and encouragement to students and staff. Among them was the Rev. Matthew Peterson, of Fairmount Presbyterian Church. He wandered the crash site Feb. 13 in case any students needed a hug or wanted to talk.

Bode said, "The other praise has to go to the hockey parents and how they have come through to help each other. It's inspiring to see."

She said there was an "outpouring of parents" coming in to help.

That "Monday was a huge emotional outpouring of grief and sadness and a lot of numb, numb students and shocked, shocked students," she said. "This affected so many staff members and the student counselors, even beyond the high school at Monticello and Boulevard where the children had gone to school."

It didn't surprise Bode that Scott came to school. She said groups of students are helping and working it out among each other.

"Adolescents need to be with their friends right now more than their parents. I know that hurts parents, but their peer groups are essential to them," she said. "They need guidance and love from their parents, but their draw to their peer group is extremely significant."

She said the school tried to get students back into some sort of routine and back to the classroom by the end of the week.

 "By having the structure in place lets them feel safe," she said. "I would encourage students to do class, or if they couldn't focus, to do a little bit of work, or if they couldn't do that, to participate in the support groups."

She said some students were concerned they weren't crying. She said they were in shock and still numb.

"It's a long slow process," she added. "This is going to be an on-going need. Just because today's Friday, our work doesn't end."

        © 2001 Sun Newspapers



OBITUARIES
from The Cleveland Plain Dealer

Kyle Barden
Beloved son of Ann Kramer andSteven Barden; loving brother of Shannon, Abrielle and Elliot Barden; dear grandson of Mary V. Barden.

Services will be held Tuesday, Feb. 13 at4 p.m. at BERKOWITZ-KUMIN-BOOKATZ MEMORIAL CHAPEL, 1985 S. TAYLOR RD., CLEVELAND HTS. Family requests NO VISITATION.

Contributions suggested to The Youth Recreation Scholarship Fund c/o the City of Cleveland Hts.
 

Brendon Robert Benner
Age 18, beloved son of Bill Benner and Debra Shepherd-Benner; brother of Aria and Joe Benner; grandson of Alice Shepherd, Zora Benner and Robert Shepherd (wife Diane); nephew of many aunts and uncles. Brendon touched many with his open, loving heart and his joy for life. Brendon will always be much loved.

Funeral services Wednesday 7 p.m. at MAHER- MELBOURNE FUNERAL HOME AND CREMATION CENTER, 4274 MAYFIELD RD. (AT BELVOIR BLVD.), SOUTH EUCLID, (216-382-4500), where the family will receive friends WEDNESDAY 4 P.M. UNTIL TIME OF SERVICE. Brendon's mother will also be receiving visitors at her home THROUGH FRIDAY EVENING SUNSET.

Family suggests memorial gifts to the Brendon Robert Benner Scholarship Fund, c/o Cleveland Hts. Board of Education, Grant Coordinator, 2155 Miramar Rd., University Hts. 44118; or to any Fifth Third Bank Branch.
 

Milton Ceal Carter II
Age 18. Cherished son of Milton C. Sr. and Justine Vaughn-Carter; dearest brother of Tanya Carter, Gwendolyn and Leon Vaughn and Antoinette McDowell; loving uncle of Brandon McDowell and Damon Carter; dear nephew and cousin of the Carter, DeFoor, Vaughn and Choffey families.

Family suggests contributions may be made in Milton's memory to the MetroHealth Foundation-5th Floor Trauma Unit, 2500 MetroHealth Dr., Towers 135A, Cleveland 44109 or to the Heights Hockey Parents, c/o Joseph J. Gaglioti, 3071 N. Park Blvd., Cleveland Hts. 44118.

Family will receive friends to pay tribute to and celebrate the life of Milton at DeJOHN-FLYNN-MYLOTT FUNERAL HOME OF SOUTH EUCLID, 4600 MAYFIELD RD., (JUST EAST OF GREEN RD.), THURSDAY 2-4 AND 6-9 P.M. AND FRIDAY 1-3 P.M. The Mass of Christian Burial will be celebrated Friday, Feb. 16 at 6 p.m. at St. Philomena Church, 13824 Euclid Ave., E. Cleveland. Interment private. A Trust 100 Funeral HomeFor Directions please visit www.DeJohnFuneral.com


contructed by
John W. Stephens II
Teacher - Cleveland Heights High School
2/23/2001